leviticus 19:18

i have come to terms, i am a hopeless romantic.

my favorite song of all times are tied

The way you look tonight-Frank Sinatra

La Vie en Rose - Pretty much anyone

i love any movie where the good guy gets the girl

and kisses her in the rain and never cheats.

He buys her the perfect ring, her friends love him

he is patient, kind and absolutely amazing looking.

He cooks, he cleans, he only wants true happiness for her

and he can dress like no other.

I am NOT ever going to STOP believing this will happen to ME someday!!!

I honestly feel like there is someone out there who meets every single one of my standards.

My problem is talking myself into wasting time with these silly boys who are pretty much broken, dumb, immature, emotionally unattached jerks and trying to fix them which honestly isn't EVER in a million years going to happen. I mean first of it is really selfish of me to try to fix someone who isn't broken to their future "Mrs.". Which I mean don't take this the wrong way I am not really looking for my "Mr." but at my age I feel it is important to keep in mind there must be enough of you left once you get done with all the "Mr " that your still able to get THE "Mr. " Another thing that is wrong with "fixing" someone is who are you? I mean honestly God made them that way for a reason. It may be a heart break from the bitch before or he is at a rough stage in his life. This made me think back on Leviticus 19:18 "Do not speak revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord." Basically this is one of the hardest things I face. ever. I hold grudges like no other. I didn't talk to my bff from childhood for two years because I couldn't come to terms enough to forgive her. How am I going to love a jerk, sorry I mean a man as I love myself when he is selfish, mean, doesn't give a damn about me or my feelings and has admitted to this in nonverbal ways, again and again. I know i am almost just as much to blame because I kept coming back. All so much to take on.

Well it was a good day overall, kind of fast felt like I couldn't catch up with it.. probably my lack of sleeping. Therefore I am going to bed EARLY tonight!!!